Your intuition is an incredible ally when it comes to your safety, a gift that’s always with you. But in a world that prioritises logic and reason over gut feelings, countless women have been taught to silence this inner voice. Tragically, this conditioning has left many vulnerable, sometimes with devastating consequences.
How many times have you had that quiet little voice inside telling you to change your plan or question someone’s motives? That voice, that intuition, is no mystical entity; it’s your innate survival system, honed for your safety.
I feel the best way for me to start this important article is by exploring first what intuition is. The word intuition comes from the Latin verb intueri translated as consider or from the late middle English word intuit, which means to contemplate.
Two great resources to help us further understand what intuition is are the distinguished online publication Psychology Today, as well as Dr. Lois Isenman, Resident Scholar at the Women’s Studies Research Centre of Brandeis University.
Psychology Today identifies intuition as:
“…a form of knowledge that appears in consciousness without obvious deliberation. It is not magical but rather a faculty in which hunches are generated by the unconscious mind rapidly sifting through experience and cumulative knowledge. Often referred to as gut feelings, intuition tends to arise holistically and quickly, without awareness of the underlying mental processing of information. Scientists have repeatedly demonstrated how information can register on the brain without conscious awareness and positively influence decision making and other behaviour.”
Dr. Lois Isenman, Resident Scholar at the Women’s Studies Research Centre of Brandeis University mentions three distinctive levels of intuition in her book “Intuition: A Journey in and Out of Science”:
“At one level, the content level, intuition refers to insights that pop into the mind without effort and reorient understanding in important, novel, and sometimes radical ways. At another level, the processing level, it refers to a specific way of integrating information that occurs below awareness and supports direct knowing or knowing without conscious thinking. At yet another level, the evaluative level, it refers to an unconscious mode of evaluation that allows us to judge whether our own or others’ ideas are true.”
Neuroscientist and Psychologist Joel Pearson of the University of New South Wales, who has studied this subject for 25 years, also found a way of explain it extremely well:
“It’s processing all the things in the environment: the time of day, how well it’s lit, how well it’s not lit, the pace someone’s walking, the shadows, the tone—and a hundred other things. It’s making a prediction based on prior learning, situations you’ve been in, movies you’ve watched, and everything you’ve experienced in life.”
Belief in yourself and trust your intuition
This article is committed to helping you believe in yourself and defend both yourself and those around you through the use of your intuition, sometimes even by countering social pressures and societal norms.
Intuition may have a supernatural quality to it, but it is most certainly not some random delusion, it is in fact a cognitive process.
You cannot possibly pay attention to all the information that you are processing, so your subconscious does that work for you. Your intuition is based on your subconscious observations, individual experiences you might have had in your life or on the processing of relevant information in your subconsciousness. Intuition helps you to subconsciously consider and contemplate information without you being aware of the underlying mental processing of the information, and you are doing that at an incomprehensive level of speed. Intuition is so much faster than the step-by-step thinking that we rely on. It is knowing without knowing why. Your intuition will usually discard the irrelevant and value the meaningful. Your intuition will also recognise warning signals you may not consciously recognise, helping you identify potential threats or dangerous situations before they escalate.
However, please note that your personal safety can be directly compromised if you choose to dismiss your intuition. You offer no greater cooperation to a potential attacker than by subconsciously acknowledging certain information, feeling uneasy because of your intuition, but then deciding not to take any action to change the situation. Allow me to give you an example:
A female lone worker, employed by an insurance company is entering a block of apartments. On her agenda today is a visit to a family on the seventh floor, to discuss the details of a new insurance policy with a young husband and father of two. The woman who is usually not easily afraid is waiting for an elevator, and when the door opens, she sees a man inside. Something tells her that something is not right, something just does not feel right. She has got that feeling in her gut. It may be the late hour, his size, his facial expression, him avoiding eye contact or the way he looks at her, the rate of attacks in the neighbourhood, an article she has recently read, or the type of training she has recently undergone in her company – it does not matter at all why. The critical point is, she is now starting to feel a little anxious. How does she respond to her intuition, that exceptionally helpful tool nature has given her? She suppresses it, telling herself: “I’m not going to live like this, I’m not going to insult this guy by letting the door close in his face, I’m not going to make a drama out of this, and I’m not going to be silly.”
Which is sillier: listening to and trusting your intuition, prioritising your safety, and waiting for the next elevator, or getting into a soundproofed steel box with a stranger who made you feel anxious or uneasy just 10 seconds ago?
Why do so many women ignore their intuition?
Despite its power, intuition is often suppressed in women due to social conditioning that prioritises politeness and compliance, even at personal risk.
Common reasons include:
- Dismissal by Others: Women are often told they are overreacting or being unreasonable, instilling self-doubt.
- Fear of Appearing Rude: Due to cultures, environments, and certain upbringings, many women are socialised and conditioned to prioritise being likeable, even when it counts against them. I urge you to prioritise your well-being over the feelings and opinions of others. Don’t hesitate to cause a scene or make someone uncomfortable if it ensures your safety. Your well-being comes must come first, so, do whatever it takes to get through the day safely.
- Reliance on Logic: In a world that rates realistic evidence over intuition, women may disregard their intuition in favour of sensible explanations and logic.
This conditioning can have catastrophic consequences, leaving women more vulnerable to threats they might otherwise avoid by trusting their gut feeling.
How to boost your intuition
Intuition functions like a muscle; the more you use it, the stronger it becomes. Here’s how to foster it:
- Pay Attention to Physical Cues: Your body often senses danger before your mind fully registers it. Pay attention to physical cues such as an increase in your heart rate, the hair standing up on the back of your neck, a tightening sensation in your stomach, or a sudden wave of anxiety.
- Trust the Data: Your intuition is partly based on real world information, your personal experiences, observations, and subconscious analysis. As Joel Pearson explains, it is your brain making predictions based on what it has learned.
- Learn to Say No: Empower yourself to say no, walk away, or speak up if something doesn’t feel right. Your safety is more important than someone else’s feelings or approval. Worry a little less about other and look after yourself a little more.
How to overcome difficulties to acting on intuition
Even when your intuition is telling you something in a loud and clear voice, societal pressures and norms can hold you back. Here’s how to overcome these barriers:
- Challenge Stereotypes: Break free from outdated expectations that demand suppression. Your life is worth far more than another person’s thoughts or feelings.
- Redefine “Overreacting”: Acting on intuition is not overreacting, it simply is being proactive and smart. Especially when it comes to your personal safety, it is far better to be safe than sorry.
- Trust Yourself Over Others: When someone says, “You’re overreacting,” don’t doubt your gut feeling, your instinct. You know yourself better than anyone else.
Always trust your instincts
Your intuition is a gift, forged by evolution and fine-tuned by your personal life experiences. It is not a sign of weakness or irrationality; it is a powerful tool for survival.
As Gavin de Becker author of The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence, astutely writes: “It’s always right in at least two ways: it’s in response to something, and it has your best interest at heart.”
Starting today, give yourself permission to fully trust your intuition. Honour that inner voice and take decisive action when it speaks.
For more more in-depth information on intuition, your state of awarness, manipulatve strategies used by pepetrators, and many other subjects related to women’s safety, please consider reading my book NEVER A VICTIM – The Definitive Guide to Women’s Safety. Alternatively you might wish to read my recent blog, titled Top 10 Personal Safety Tips All Women Should Know.