Non-fatal strangulation (NFS) in domestic violence is one of the most chilling and dangerous forms of abuse, yet it often goes unnoticed. It rarely leaves visible injuries, but research shows it is one of the strongest predictors of future homicide. Survivors frequently describe it as the moment they believed they might die, and studies confirm that women who have been strangled by a partner are up to seven times more likely to be killed later. This article explains what NFS is, why it’s so deadly, the warning signs to look out for, and what every woman should know to protect herself.
With the recent release of The Information Leaflet for Victims of Strangulation by The Institute for Addressing Strangulation (IFAS) in January 2025, this deeply disturbing form of violence is finally receiving the attention it deserves. Strangulation is one of the most chilling acts of control and aggression, whether inflicted by an abusive partner, someone familiar, or a complete stranger. Beyond its terrifying immediacy, its physical and psychological impact can be long-term. While much has been discussed about recognising the dangers and seeking support, I want to focus on something equally critical: the protection and defence from this particular act of violence. What can you do if you find yourself in this life-threatening situation? How can you increase your chances of survival? These are the questions I intend to address.
My peer-reviewed article on NFS has recently been published in Partner Abuse. For those working in safeguarding, risk assessment, or frontline response, the following reference may be of particular interest:
- Kaiser, R. (2026). Escalation pattern analysis in non-fatal strangulation: Lethality risk and safeguarding in intimate partner violence. Partner Abuse. Advance online publication. https://doi.org/10.1891/PA-2025-0043
Why Is NFS in Domestic Violence So Dangerous?
When it comes to the law of self-defence in your country, I encourage you to seek guidance from one of the many legal experts available. Here in the UK, there are professionals I genuinly and deeply respect, and I strongly recommend reaching out to them for advice. My expertise lies in providing knowledge that can help you survive a real-life, life-threatening situation. In such a moment, my advice is simple: don’t ask for permission—seek forgiveness later, especially when you are on the verge of potentially taking your last breath.
Before I delve into the techniques, methods, or strategies for dealing with such a man, it is crucial to highlight some particularly important anatomical facts.
What Happens to the Body During Strangulation?
- Strangulation can render a victim unconscious in seconds, then anoxic seizure, then bladder incontinence, and, then bowel incontinence
- Strangulation blocks veins and arteries in the neck so that oxygenated blood cannot flow to the brain and deoxygenated blood cannot flow from the brain.
- Strangulation takes just eleven pounds of pressure to cut off blood flow.
- Strangulation can lead to temporary or permanent brain damage in as little as 30 seconds.
- Strangulation can cause death between 62 and 152 seconds.
- Strangulation is a common precursor to further lethal violence.
- Strangulation is a tactic of control and abuse, and a powerful method of coercion and control; it is an expression of abusers’ ability and willingness to take their victims’ lives at any time.
I hope these points highlight the necessity of gaining a sufficient understanding of how to respond when confronted with such a threat.
Unfortunately, far too many self-proclaimed self-defence experts offer advice that can only be described as utter nonsense, useless, ineffective, and detached from reality. The truth is, real self-defence isn’t about flashy, complex moves that look impressive in a movie. When your life is on the line, effective self-defence demands decisive, often brutal and vicious actions, regardless of how your moral compass may feel about it.
What Are the Warning Signs of NFS?
It is a fact that many attacks of this nature are both avoidable and preventable. Often, the aggressor’s voice will rise before the attack. He may suddenly start using swear words or threatening language in an attempt to intimidate you. His overall demeanour may become more hostile. The attacker’s body language and facial expressions can also signal an imminent escalation, he might step forward or clench his fists. Many domestic violence survivors report that, in hindsight, they recognised certain signs that hostility was increasing and that the energy in the room had shifted.
Why is Situational Awareness Critical for Preventing Strangulation?
Regrettably, NFS is a frequent occurrence in both abusive relationships and attacks by strangers. Sadly, a lack of situational or environmental awareness, the mistaken belief that the attacker will calm down, the hope for even clearer signs of hostility, or reliance on someone else to intervene before the situation escalates further often result in inaction or a significant delay in an appropriate response from the victim. Indeed, many instances of strangulation can be prevented by staying aware, remaining alert, trusting your intuition, and recognising the warning signs.
How to Defend Yourself Against a Strangulation Attempt
If your assailant attempts to strangle you, he will most likely raise one or both arms towards your neck or throat. This may escalate rapidly, but if you have already noticed signs of increasing hostility and remained alert, any shift in his body language, stance, or approach (becoming more aggressive) should not come as a complete surprise or feel like an ambush. The crucial point is to act the moment you see him raising one or both hands, rather than waiting until his grip is locked around your neck, and you are seconds away from blacking out. The time to protect yourself from strangulation is the very instant you see his hands moving towards your neck. Do not wait a second longer.
How to Target Vulnerable Areas for Maximum Impact
I urge you to step forward with all your energy, speed, force, and aggression, striking him with everything you have. For example, deliver a brutal, violent, and ferociously executed hammer fist strike to the side of his neck. This is an effective technique. Press all four fingers together firmly, keeping your thumb loose. Extend your hand as though for a handshake, squeezing your fingers together tightly to form a solid mass… this is your fist. Swing it as you would a hammer onto a nail or an axe onto a log. Channel all your anger, fear, determination, and aggression into this single strike, and turn your predator into the prey.
Alternatively, punch his throat with your fist or open hand as hard as you can. Or, if necessary, jump on him, grab and tear his ears with all your strength, and bite his nose or cheek as hard as possible. Be relentless, be violent, be unstoppable. In that moment, you must become a wild beast. Ignore any hesitation, cause maximum damage until you can escape safely. Waiting a single second longer and allowing him to wrap his hands around your neck will significantly weaken your position and, in the worst case, cost you your life.
How to Respond If You’re Being Strangled
My advice is simple: you have only a few seconds, so make them count by causing as much damage as possible. Do not waste precious time and energy trying to break his grip, as his frenzied rage, the effects of drugs or alcohol, or sheer physical strength may make this nearly impossible. While your instinct may be to fight his grip, resist this urge as you will run out of time quickly. Instead, think aggressively and focus on attacking, not defending.
It is unlikely the attacker will lock his arms and position himself to keep his head, torso, and legs out of your reach. More likely, he will get close, threatening you further, hissing horrific things in your ear, or screaming at you. However, this also means he is within your reach, so do your worst.
Focus on the parts of his body that will cause the most excruciating pain. Stab your fingers into his eyes, grab an ear and try to rip it off, break his nose, and drive your knee into his groin as hard as you can. If he starts mouthing intimidating nonsense into your ear, his cheek is likely close to your mouth, so bite it violently. Be ruthless. If you can grab anything hard and solid, smash it against his head with full force. A man who is strangling you is an extremely dangerous control freak, and you must neutralise the threat by inflicting maximum pain or immobilising him with a serious injury.
What to Do After Experiencing NFS?
It is important to recognise that strangulation is a significant predictor of future lethal violence. If your partner has strangled you, it is crucial to acknowledge the seriousness of this behaviour. Research published in the Journal of Emergency Medicine indicates that prior NFS by an intimate partner increases the risk of attempted homicide by approximately sevenfold and completed homicide by about eightfold.
Dr. Jacquelyn Campbell, Professor of Nursing at Johns Hopkins University said: “Non-fatal strangulation is an important risk factor for homicide of women. Prior non-fatal strangulation was associated with greater than six-fold odds of becoming an attempted homicide and over seven-fold odds of becoming a completed homicide”.
Dr. Clare Healy, a Forensic Specialist, and often described as New Zealand’s foremost GP expert on medical care after sexual assault, supported this by stating: “Non-fatal strangulation is a significant predictor of future lethal violence.”
This is why more countries are now treating choking, suffocation, or strangulation, and even attempts at these violent acts, with greater seriousness.
For example, in Victoria, Australia, new laws to protect women have come into effect. Perpetrators who intentionally injure victims through NFS now face up to a decade in prison. The charge of intentional NFS does not require proof of injury and carries a maximum five-year jail term, while those who intentionally cause injury by strangulation can face up to ten years in prison.
These changes, known as ‘Joy’s Law’, were driven by the advocacy of Joy Rowley’s family after her tragic death. In October 2011, 60-year-old Joy Rowley was found dead in her home. Her former partner, James Mulhall, was later sentenced to 19 years in prison after pleading guilty to her murder. Numerous domestic violence incidents had been recorded before her death.
About the Author
Robert Kaiser is the Founder of The Women’s Safety Institute, a researcher and practitioner specializing in intimate partner violence (IPV), escalation dynamics, and behavioral trajectories. Prior to his research career, he served in intelligence services and overseas security. His work focuses on developing Escalation Pattern Analysis (EPA), an annalytical, trajectory-based early-warning framework, to understand risk progression and lethality in IPV. His research integrates criminology, forensic psychology and behavioral science, with a particular focus on preventing high-harm and lethality outcomes. He is currently pursuing a PhD in Criminology, focusing on Advancing Escalation Pattern Analysis Across the Dynamics of Intimate Partner Violence to Improve Lethality Assessments. Robert is also the author of NEVER A VICTIM, a 530-page, 115,000-word, survivor-led, trauma-informed guide to women’s safety.